Letting Go

in Features

You are Enough

I found myself wandering into the terrain of the Divine Feminine this morning. H’mmm – interesting I thought. Morning study is always best for me.

This pull towards really understanding the Divine Man/Woman connection and how I sabotage or honour ‘my’ Divine Feminine energy with ‘his’ Divine Masculine.

I ask my self – “In what ways do I feed and nurture this sacred connection/union on a healthy level?” And how does this link in with ‘You are Enough’?

And I realised that it is about feeling that you are ‘enough’ as you are and it is safe to let go of the old stuff of survival and to allow the emergence of the new … which is really the old, the hidden stuff, the silenced Feminine or Masculine.

The survival strategies, which served you so very well, are no longer appropriate. Indeed, they are the opposite – they are now destructive. They have become structures for self-sabotage. In this rapidly changing world that we live, our survival instincts have been nudging their way back into our daily lives in ways that we couldn’t have imagined a few short years ago.  And, while we strive to move forward in life, the reality is that we fall back into old patterns which served us well, at one time, and which we subconsciously dive back into for cover when we feel threatened or fearful. And there is much of that around!

As a young single mum of two boys, I can see now that the drive of the Feminine Energy in me to nurture and care for my sons is what drove the Masculine Energy in me to be the provider, caretaker, protector.  And so, I became both.  Thank goodness for that.  We all have masculine and feminine energy and the key is to recognise it and have it in balance. We need both. However, the challenge is to find the balance and to maintain it in a healthy way. Our planet, Mother earth, is way out of alignment at the moment and is tilting and weaving in her attempts to get back in balance. Mother earth needs us to develop the feminine energy of caretaking and nurturing in order for the human race to continue living an existence that is worth living. We have had enough war and competition, enough misdirected value placed on materialism and ‘things’.  Too much doing not enough being.

In order to become the Divine Male/Female that you truly are, that is your real strength, you must let go of the old strategies. They are obsolete, they are holding you back.

We hold on to old habits and beliefs like we hold onto trauma. Just in case it happens again, I can be prepared. Thus, oftentimes, ensuring that it will indeed happen again and so I can prove, over and over, that I can survive it. That the mechanisms are still in place and thus I am strong. Oh, so wrong! 

This is not, in any way, to minimalise the necessity and importance of the structures which have served us so well. It is to elucidate the importance of recognising that their time is gone and we must let go of them.  Letting go is scary but necessary if we are to evolve and live our best life.

How is it possible, you might ask, to actually let go of such deeply embedded habits. Surely, they have become intrinsic to who we really are. Or we think they are because they are so familiar and we feel dependent on them. We identify who we are through these embedded habits and would be at a loss as to how to navigate a single day without them. This is similar to the ties we have with narcissistic family members. Or toxic friends. Or the daily job which draws your energy and devoids you of your creativity but is ‘safe’ and, more or less, pays the bills. 

Letting go isn’t easy and can only happen successfully when you feel that ‘you are enough’ in yourself to recognise that you deserve better so you can let go and move on. The way to feel that ‘you are enough’ is to let go of the emotional blocks that were put in place when you were a little impressionable child and then reinforced by yourself and others as you grew and developed. Bequeathed to you by overprotective parents and carers who wanted to keep you safe from risk. Risk taking is not seen as being a safe thing to do and so loving protection can (and often does) backfire.  Of course, much damage is also bequeathed by parents who did not have the tools, or were too damaged themselves, to parent in a healthy, loving way, perhaps seeking to have their own needs met at the expense of their child’s. 

To let go of limiting beliefs and know that ‘you are enough’ is a hard, if satisfying, road. It takes the desire and willingness to undertake deep inner work and to look at very uncomfortable things which you experienced, the repercussions of which shaped you and have been guiding you through life for so long, long after they were done.  It is also important to be aware that knowing that you are enough will require lifelong maintenance much in the same way as other healthy daily habits for life. Habits like having a daily shower – and they can be done at the same time! 

Honour and accept the part of you that has held these beliefs so dearly for so long.  It was only trying to keep you safe.  Let it go with gratitude and love and remember – 

“You are enough”.  

Kate Mchardy  MA(Hons)  PGCE MSPH. 

Spiritual coach, teacher and healer.

The University of Light Group


katemch@gmail.com • +44 7712889534

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