The Inner You

in Features

So… who is the inner you? Is there an inner you? Have you ever thought about this?  I find it an intriguing idea and something I have worked on a great deal over the years.

There are many different approaches to find your inner self and there is no right or wrong way to do so. I think to put it simplistically it is about going within and finding out what truly makes us tick.

In a world where things have become so materialistic and so technified we have increasingly lost touch with who we really are and we have become sadly out of touch with our feelings. Thus, we also lose touch with connecting with others on a feeling level. So how can we rectify this and would we want to?

Well, I think it is super important to be aware of ourselves as being spiritual beings living in material bodies, and also, that both aspects are equally important. We live in a physical/material world and it is essential that we connect to it on a physical material level. The imbalance comes when we become stuck in the material aspect of life and forget that to be balanced we need to be connected to the higher energies also.

How to do this?  Well, we can start by becoming aware of the things that do not change. The sun never forgets to rise and set and the moon never forgets to wax and wane. The tides never forget their rhythm of high or low and the seasons never forget to flow perfectly into one another. Right now, Spring is coming to life all around us and, fortunately, nothing and no one can stop the birds from singing as they busy around building their nests. Nothing and no one can stop the trees from budding or the flowers from uplifting and delighting us with their amazing and beautiful profusion of colours. New life is a beacon of hope and love and we all started out there as new babies… and the truth is that we revisit these seasons of our lives over and over as long as we live.   

So, I think it is important to recognise that we can always start over; wherever we are in life… we can always have springtime again. Life is full of firsts, full of new beginnings and it starts in the heart.  

A great way to activate the heart energy is to think about what we are grateful for. Gratitude is a whole big subject in itself but, for now, we can touch on it briefly, just to get going. So, take a breath and allow a thought that makes you smile slip in, and say thank you quietly to yourself. It is as easy as that to get started, and when you have done that once, then you can do it even more easily the second time… and then the third and then the fourth… and so on! Let it become a habit. It is such a good habit and one to pass on and share with others. The practice of gratitude will open up so much for you. Once you have the habit, you will never look back.   

Then you can graduate to being grateful for being you! Start in small ways by accepting compliments! Yes, really. So many of us find it easy to give compliments but so difficult to receive. How many times have you blushed when someone said something simple like “Your hair looks lovely today” and you reply “oh no, it is such a mess. I am so overdue an appointment with my hairdresser!” We have all done it!   Well, did you know that you are actually saying to your friend “OMG have you no taste…I am a mess. Yuck!” Next time just smile and say “Thank you”. 

Practice this and to be even more effective… make eye contact when you do it. Take note – people will not always remember what you have said – but they will always remember how you made them feel.

Kate McHardy is a Personal and Spiritual Counsellor. 


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